As with most things in life, I blame James Dellow. James may have concerns about the robustness of Technorati's ranking system but all I want to do is get to the top.
I have an authority of merely 35 and a ranking of 138,063. This is unacceptable. I must ascend at all costs. Dennis Price only had 8 meddlers to stand in his way to glory (all played by Alec Guinness). I have over 100,000 (I am not sure whether they all look like Alec Guinness or not).
One option is simply to spam people's comment boxes ("Hey, I see you from your blog that you like cheese. Waddya know, I lurve cheese too. Let's be bestest buddies & link to each other!!!") but that looks far to time consuming.
Instead I decided to identify a location with a population of 138,000 where everyone, everyone has a blog. All I have to do is take these jackanapes out of the blogging equation and sweet, sweet victory will be mine.
And I have found such a place. Step forward: The Province of Prince Edward Island, Canada.
Now I was planning on smiting them from the face of the earth like the pestilence they are but after an unfortunate misunderstanding at the Botany View Hotel last Thursday, I am on smiting probation. Instead I will sever contact between Prince Edward (he was already my second least favourite prince before I discovered this atrocity) Island & the rest of civilisation. I am not sure how but these are mere details. If you have any ideas out there, send them on a virtual postcard please - once I ascend to blogging victory you will be rewarded beyond your wildest dreams (assuming your wildest dreams involve battenburg cake & a second-hand iPod nano).
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment